If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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