So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Randomize
