Yo dont text me then not text me
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
