Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
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