i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize