She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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