Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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