we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
