found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
