Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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