She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
