Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
