Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
