Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
