He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
