No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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