kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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