he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
