you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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