just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize