He is an equal opportunity slut.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
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