She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
