when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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