he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
