So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I need to sanitize my soul.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Randomize
