you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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