i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
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