So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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