Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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