Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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