we're blogging at a bar
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
