Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I could make wine with my vomit
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
you had me at cake vodka
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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