I'm sorry my penis didn't work
its not stalking. its research.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
