i don't want you to think of me as your TA
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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