something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
