Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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