One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize