I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
