where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
