The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
