so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
