my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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