so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Randomize
