Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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