Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
