Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
