There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Randomize
