lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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