He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize
