Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Randomize