Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
