i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
