My first STD was from a foam party
He is an equal opportunity slut.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
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